There have been many haunting moments throughout six U.S. seasons of Love Is Blind—and many more, to be sure, on its spin-offs around the globe and its seventh U.S. season, premiering on Oct. 2. Of course, the entire premise of Love Is Blind is somewhat scary to begin with: a week, give or take, to decide on an engagement, and another few to decide on committing to marriage. As married co-hosts Nick and Vanessa Lachey put it: “Will you get married—or will you choose to walk away forever?”
This artificial binary is, of course, not a sane or rational way to approach love and marriage. That approach would include a third option somewhere in the middle, like choosing to continue the relationship away from the lights and cameras to see if it has long-term potential, before making a lifelong commitment. But reality television was not made to be sane or rational, and many of the contestants on the show say they are indeed there because all their sane and rational ways have left them unhappily single.
There are plenty of other haunting aspects of the Netflix reality series, from its archaic monogamous heteronormativity to the multiple lawsuits alleging dangerous working conditions, a lack of consideration for participants’ mental health, and sexual assault (all claims which the production companies that make the show have denied). It is, to put it plainly, not an entirely guilt-free guilty pleasure.
And yet, the show has only grown more popular: In early March the last season topped Nielsen’s streaming viewership ratings for the first time, with 2.11 billion minutes viewed in the previous week. Which is to say, viewers will be seated for season 7, which features a cast from the Washington, D.C. area looking for their own fairy-tale endings. In time for the new episodes, we’ve looked back on four years of the show to hand-pick the most unforgettable moments, in which villains were born, dogs were plied with Merlot, and one brokenhearted man-child rode off into the sunset on a jet ski.
Jessica gives wine to her dog, whom she maybe loves more than her fiancé (Season 1)
The most haunting moment of the first season of Love is Blind did not occur between two humans. It transpired between a human and a canine, when Jessica lowered her goblet to allow her pooch, Payton, to lap up some red wine. The backlash was swift and loud, if lighthearted; Jessica was already receiving criticism for her handling of her relationship with the decade-her-junior Mark, and viewers may have been on the lookout for flaws. Jessica later told Entertainment Weekly that doggie happy hour wasn’t a regular occurrence in her home, chalking the moment up to her overall discomfort while filming, and adding that her discomfort with the entire set-up of the show led to an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. According to her Instagram, not only is Jessica now married (though not to Mark) with a baby, but Payton recently celebrated her 10th birthday. Instead of a nice Merlot, though, she marked the occasion with a jog on the beach.—Eliza Berman
Shake asks if he could put Deepti on his shoulders (Season 2)
Despite the fact that he was on a show called Love Is Blind, where the entire premise is that you can fall in love with someone sight unseen, Abishek, who went by “Shake,” was obsessed with what the physical bodies of his potential mates looked like. In the pods, instead of pursuing emotional connection, Shake brazenly screened his dates about their bodies, even going so far as to ask one what size she was and telling another that he preferred to date people that “work out.” The most egregious display of this was his first conversation with Deepti, a contestant he would later propose to, where he queries whether or not she’s thin enough for him to put her on his shoulders at a music festival, asking her, “Will I have trouble picking you up?” For Deepti, this question foreshadowed how their romance was doomed from the start. “Shake doesn’t understand how Love Is Blind has to work,” she said in a confessional after his question. “The whole point is finding out who we are as people—not ‘Can you carry me?’’’ While the couple did get engaged, their relationship was rocky, mostly plagued by Shake’s shallow judgments and self-hatred (in addition to being sizeist and misogynistic, the man also seemingly has internalized racism, having only dated white women before Deepti, then loudly proclaiming he wasn’t physically attracted to her and comparing her to his aunt) and ended when Deepti left Shake at the altar. In the years since they broke up, Deepti went on to date another Love Is Blind contestant, Kyle Abrams (the two split in 2023), while Shake, appropriately, appeared on House of Villains. —Cady Lang
Zanab, Cole, and the Cuties (Season 3)
This one required a more thorough analysis. For a primer on what a breakdown in communication over a couple of mandarin oranges says about why it can be so hard for partners to get on the same page, read here.
Bartise and Nancy’s abortion conversation—and Bartise in general (Season 3)
I still remember—with harrowing clarity—the abortion conversation between Bartise and Nancy. In a conversation outside of the pods and in the real world, walking red flag Bartise says that people should only be allowed to have one abortion in their lifetime. They get one “pass.” Nancy vehemently disagrees. “I have no say in anyone’s body. If you need to have an abortion, have it,” she says. It’s refreshing to see a reality star speak so plainly about abortion—and just as tiring to see Bartise use this debate as ammo when Nancy meets his family for the first time (supervillain behavior). His sister starts sobbing. His family is in tears over Nancy being pro-choice! And though this should have been a topic covered in the pods, I’m glad they discussed it at some point. It should surprise no one that these two didn’t end up together. —Meg Zukin
Colleen takes Matt to be her lawfully wedded husband (Season 3)
“I do” are the words that viewers wait all season to hear. Even when a couple’s potential for lifelong bliss seems doubtful, it’s hard not to get caught up in the moment. A rare exception was Colleen’s decision to marry Matt, after a courtship marked by his scolding, tantrums, and general air of possessiveness. As the camera zoomed and the heart-pounding percussion kicked in, she told him: “You are my person, 1000%, and I will be there for you no matter what… Matty, I do.” By all rights, that vow should’ve been punctuated with the Curb Your Enthusiasm theme song. But hey, the marriage has apparently lasted, so what do I know? —Judy Berman
Zach chooses Irina (Season 4)
When criminal defense attorney Zack proposed to event planner Irina in the pods, it was the record scratch heard around the world—or at least among Love Is Blind viewers. The choice felt doomed from the start. Zack, who was caught in a love triangle with Irina and program manager Bliss, felt spectacularly incompatible with Irina. He was quirky, if a little corny. He was a hopeless romantic. His favorite song was Lee Ann Womack’s “I Hope You Dance.” Irina, famously, was none of those things: she assumed the role of Mean Girl Supreme with a ferocity that would make Regina George blush. In the end, the couple didn’t last very long (the relationship went cold a mere few days outside the pods), and post filming, Zack admitted he regretted his initial decision. But, in perhaps one of the juiciest redemption arcs of the show, Zack ended up tracking down Bliss and proposing to her—and they’re still growing strong. In fact, Zack and Bliss are expecting their first baby this spring, the first couple to announce a pregnancy from the show. A true rom-com ending! —Rachel Sonis
Chelsea and Kwame’s Calvin Klein photoshoot (Season 4)
Chelsea loves Calvin Klein. Kwame loves Chelsea. So why on God’s green earth would Kwame deny his future bride her girlhood dream of stripping down to her skivvies with her husband-to-be for an engagement photoshoot themed around CK underthings? “They’re definitely gonna be on the sexy side,” she tells the photographer. “I envision bed shots, window shots, couch shots. Definitely, like, boudoir vibes.” The result: two matching underwear sets, lots of free (if also weird) advertising for Calvin, and a series of images that showed the couple’s family more of their new in-laws than they necessarily wanted to see. Bless these two. —J.B.
JP scandalized by the sight of… makeup (Season 5)
JP and Taylor fell for each other fast in the pods, but their romance stalled out after the reveal, as he clammed up during their trip to Mexico. An exasperated Taylor finally got some answers one night, in bed, when she stopped trying to placate JP and pressed him to tell her what was wrong. It turned out that his problem was makeup—namely, the cosmetics she wore while, understandably, trying to look her best for their first face-to-face meeting. “It felt like you were fake,” he complained. “You had a cake-up face, fake eyelashes… I had makeup all over my jacket.” What’s more unhinged: destroying your entire relationship with someone you’d claimed as your soulmate over some mascara, or being aghast at the sight of a woman wearing a lot of foundation on that monument to artifice we call reality television? Taylor didn’t stick around to find out. The next morning, she broke off the engagement and headed home early. —J.B.
Stacy’s financial expectations (Season 5)
Jennifer Lopez may have made the case that “Love Don’t Cost a Thing,” but on Love Is Blind season 5, love definitely had a cost for Stacy and Izzy. While the couple had undeniable chemistry both in the pods and in Mexico after they got engaged, they ran into friction once they entered the real world and Stacy made it clear that she expected a certain kind of lifestyle—one that involved international travel and not eating off of paper plates. Her expectations were aggravated by Izzy’s reluctance to have discussions about the stability of his job (Stacy was concerned that he received no benefits and was a 1099 contractor) and his 580 credit score, while Izzy was so frazzled by Stacy’s demands that he ended up crying in a closet. Stacy’s father, however, may have summed up the disparities in their relationship best when he memorably told Izzy: “Love is blind, but sometimes love wants to fly first class.” The couple did not end up tying the knot in the finale and broke up a week after their would-be wedding. Stacy began dating another reality dating show star, Married At First Sight’s Ryan Ignasiak, while Izzy gave love another shot (this time, with an improved credit score) on a different Netflix dating show, season 2 of Perfect Match.—C.L.
Lydia and Milton get married (Season 5)
The Lydia-Milton situation was hard to watch from start to finish. First came the revelation that Lydia supposedly knew that a man she’d previously been involved with, Uche, would be on the show when she signed up for it, breaking the whole “blind” aspect of its pact. Next came Uche’s accusations of unhealthy behavior toward him in the real world, which she denied. Then Lydia started talking about it all with Uche’s love interest, Aaliyah, who decided to leave the show early due to the drama. Amid it all was the connection between Lydia, 30, and Milton, then 24, over, I guess, an appreciation for rocks? The collective cringe many viewers felt when the two became the only couple in season 5 to place rings on one another’s fingers came from the perception that Milton was just not at a stage of his life when he was ready to make a lifelong commitment and Lydia was at a stage of her life when she appeared ready to say “yes” to any decent man who asked. Maybe, though, the joke is on us…as of just last week, over two years into their (partly long-distance) marriage, they appeared in an Instagram post together trying to get a brand deal with Doordash. And what says true love if not that?—E.B.
Clay at the altar (Season 6)
AD was ready. There was no hesitation in her "I do" to Clay at the altar—and the man looked beyond thrilled to hear her promise to love him forever. But when it was his turn to make the same vows, Clay broke AD's dreams in a couple of confounding sentences: "I don't think it's responsible for me to say 'I do.' But I want you to know I'm rocking with you." Faced with the prospect of marriage, Clay seemed to consider a few serious things for the first time, like the lingering effects of his father's infidelity on his own views on commitment and what being a husband really meant. He wasn't ready to figure it all out with AD. That’s fine! No one should get married if they're not ready. But in the emotional few weeks of their relationship, Clay definitely made it seem to AD like he was willing to try. Clay's "game time decision" to say no to AD at the wedding fulfilled the point of the show, sure, but it was also painful to watch her get hurt. Though she loved him, and made it clear she would have supported him through anything, AD has since said that the moment of rejection ensured she will not be getting back together with Clay. —Mahita Gajanan
Jeramey rides a jet ski (Season 6)
“Don’t share your f-cking location if you don’t want me to check it at 5 a.m.” And with that, season 6 contestant Laura offered a nugget of wisdom that may seem obvious but apparently wasn’t to her then-fiancé Jeramey. The advice came in the ninth episode, when a furious Laura confronted Jeramey after he stayed out all night, returning home at about 6 in the morning, leaving nearly four hours unaccounted for, since their local bars closed at 2 a.m. Laura tracked Jeramey’s roving blue dot all the way to the part of town where his No. 2 in the pods, Sarah Ann, lived, learning that her fiancé had not shut the door to the possibility of a future with someone else. It was the prelude to a broken engagement, though not the most shocking moment between the couple. That happened two episodes later, when they finally called it quits and Jeramey provided one possible answer to the question, “What becomes of the brokenhearted?” Why, they get on a jet ski and ride off into the Charlotte sunset with the other woman.—E. B.
Chelsea and Jimmy’s season-long fight (Season 6)
The Ballad of Chelsea and Jimmy is one of many verses; it’s difficult to choose the greatest moment of discord between the ill-matched pair. They got off to a rocky start when she apparently did not live up to the expectation she planted in his brain that she bore even a little resemblance to Megan Fox (reader, she does!). Then there were all the fights, so many it’s almost as though they were one continuous nightmare: Chelsea’s irrepressible insecurities; Jimmy’s inability to give her the reassurance she demanded or to let go of the woulda coulda shouldas around “she’s hot but then again she’s a mom” Jessica; the fundamental disconnect over his very close relationship with a female bestie. It all came to a head at a closed-for-the-season amusement park where, after asking Chelsea if she would say “yes” at the altar, Jimmy conceded that he wouldn’t, and it all came crashing down…or did it? It would appear that the pair has, for now, found peace: they were spotted dining out together in what appeared to be relative tranquility.—E. B.
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Write to Eliza Berman at [email protected], Mahita Gajanan at [email protected] and Cady Lang at [email protected]